"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched.They must be felt with the heart."
Love is a wonderful feeling.
Saturday, October 09, 2004
Sunday, October 03, 2004
Friends Pt. 1
Friends was one of the best sitcoms of all time. Definitely one of my favourites (next to Seinfeld). A lot of times, we compare our own life to those on the sitcoms. The rapport among the cast on friends was amazing. It was almost like they weren't acting ... if you know what I mean. It seemed so easy and effortless to them ... maybe because they became real friends, which leads me to the point of this blog.
Throughout my life, I have come across many different types of people. I can remember my very first best friend Kerry-Ann in prep school. We did everything together. We were star students, teacher's pets, all round envied kids because we were involved in everything and was good at it. I eventually left Prep School to attend the school where my mother teaches, but because Kerry Ann and I lived close to each other, we still remained friends. After we took common entrance, we both passed for different high schools ... and that was where the friendship ended.
During my extremely interesting time in high school, I came across many persons and formed some very bad friendships (in retrospect). When I got to 9th grade (3rd Form as we call it here), I met a girl [we'll call her ... Hickey :)] who became my best friend. This is the first friendship that has lasted since then ... and this was 1989. That is almost 20 years worth of friendship we're talking about. We also drifted apart for about 1 year and a half as sometimes happens in friendships when your life takes a different direction or you are in a self-exploration phase. Despite the distance we felt in this time, I always had her in my thoughts and prayers. At some point, I wondered if it was something I did why we were apart and wrestled with the thought of being responsible for our separation. Thankfully, that was not the case and we are still so much like peas and carrots now!
There was also this guy, who, I met around the same time as Hickey who turned out to be one of the bestest friends any girl could ask for. That's all I'll say about that.
During the time Hickey and I were "separated" I acquired two friends while in College, who, in the short space of time became an important part of my life.
Overtime, some of these relationships went sour and it saddened me because I tried so hard to be a good friend. Now, in the present day ... all of my friends have migrated! Yeah, its like I chased them all away! And, I have had some bad experiences with these friends of mine that I have almost resolved not to form any deep, new friendships because I don't want to get hurt again. It sounds crazy and the reality is even moreso because as we speak, a "little" friendship is developing between myself and a very cool co-worker of mine - Ms. Mumpel. She is very cool.
But, one thing is for sure. Friends play an important role in anyone's life. It would be so lonely not to have someone to talk to, cry on, laugh with, argue with, learn from, teach and just have outright fun with! Some friends are forever, and I thank God for the true friends in my life.
This blog is dedicated to all the friends I've come across and all the ones that have lasted until now. Y'All are very special to me! Thanks guys!!
Throughout my life, I have come across many different types of people. I can remember my very first best friend Kerry-Ann in prep school. We did everything together. We were star students, teacher's pets, all round envied kids because we were involved in everything and was good at it. I eventually left Prep School to attend the school where my mother teaches, but because Kerry Ann and I lived close to each other, we still remained friends. After we took common entrance, we both passed for different high schools ... and that was where the friendship ended.
During my extremely interesting time in high school, I came across many persons and formed some very bad friendships (in retrospect). When I got to 9th grade (3rd Form as we call it here), I met a girl [we'll call her ... Hickey :)] who became my best friend. This is the first friendship that has lasted since then ... and this was 1989. That is almost 20 years worth of friendship we're talking about. We also drifted apart for about 1 year and a half as sometimes happens in friendships when your life takes a different direction or you are in a self-exploration phase. Despite the distance we felt in this time, I always had her in my thoughts and prayers. At some point, I wondered if it was something I did why we were apart and wrestled with the thought of being responsible for our separation. Thankfully, that was not the case and we are still so much like peas and carrots now!
There was also this guy, who, I met around the same time as Hickey who turned out to be one of the bestest friends any girl could ask for. That's all I'll say about that.
During the time Hickey and I were "separated" I acquired two friends while in College, who, in the short space of time became an important part of my life.
Overtime, some of these relationships went sour and it saddened me because I tried so hard to be a good friend. Now, in the present day ... all of my friends have migrated! Yeah, its like I chased them all away! And, I have had some bad experiences with these friends of mine that I have almost resolved not to form any deep, new friendships because I don't want to get hurt again. It sounds crazy and the reality is even moreso because as we speak, a "little" friendship is developing between myself and a very cool co-worker of mine - Ms. Mumpel. She is very cool.
But, one thing is for sure. Friends play an important role in anyone's life. It would be so lonely not to have someone to talk to, cry on, laugh with, argue with, learn from, teach and just have outright fun with! Some friends are forever, and I thank God for the true friends in my life.
This blog is dedicated to all the friends I've come across and all the ones that have lasted until now. Y'All are very special to me! Thanks guys!!
A Mother's Love
There's something about a mother's love that cannot be compared to anything else in the world. I say this not because I have experienced this but because I've heard many people say it in my lifetime.
This distance always seemed to exist between myself and my mother. Ever since birth, I have always been closer to my father. I do remember pleasant memories of my childhood but for as far back as I can remember, since I was old enough, my mother and I have always been at logger heads. This I remember started when I was 10 years old and has continued to this day. I do believe that in her own way, she loves me. I'm not sure how or how much, but I gather that a mother's love for her child is incomparable to any love you could ever experience. Being an only child, I suppose that statement is even moreso.
I believe the distance is as a result of my mother not really getting to know who I am. Right now, if my mother was to buy a gift for me, she would get something that I would never buy for myself in a million years. My father ... could go away and shop for my clothes!
This whole relationshing rift between my mother and I came into sharp focus yesterday when she expressed concern for me. I was not sure how to react and so I didn't. I was somewhat angry for what she said to me and my mother has always been able to do that. However, it lead me to think of our relationship as a whole and wondered if I could have been the reason for the rift all along. I thought long and hard about it and came to a conclusion .... we were both responsible for it. Because of some of the things she did and the reactions she displayed to various situations, it caused me to clam up and keep things to myself. My father and I have the most wonderful relationship that amazes people whenever they see us together. They either think we are a couple or that we are brother and sister. No such thing with my mother.
A lot of occurences in my life has led me to think about this and I feel like she's reaching out to me right now. I've never really told her how I feel because I don't think she would take it very well. I don't want her to think that she has failed as a mother because ironically, I don't think she has failed at all. She did a good job of raising me, but in my eyes, my father contributed most to my development and raising me to the woman I am today. I am still trying to put all of this into perspective and hope that whatever I decide is the best thing to do.
This distance always seemed to exist between myself and my mother. Ever since birth, I have always been closer to my father. I do remember pleasant memories of my childhood but for as far back as I can remember, since I was old enough, my mother and I have always been at logger heads. This I remember started when I was 10 years old and has continued to this day. I do believe that in her own way, she loves me. I'm not sure how or how much, but I gather that a mother's love for her child is incomparable to any love you could ever experience. Being an only child, I suppose that statement is even moreso.
I believe the distance is as a result of my mother not really getting to know who I am. Right now, if my mother was to buy a gift for me, she would get something that I would never buy for myself in a million years. My father ... could go away and shop for my clothes!
This whole relationshing rift between my mother and I came into sharp focus yesterday when she expressed concern for me. I was not sure how to react and so I didn't. I was somewhat angry for what she said to me and my mother has always been able to do that. However, it lead me to think of our relationship as a whole and wondered if I could have been the reason for the rift all along. I thought long and hard about it and came to a conclusion .... we were both responsible for it. Because of some of the things she did and the reactions she displayed to various situations, it caused me to clam up and keep things to myself. My father and I have the most wonderful relationship that amazes people whenever they see us together. They either think we are a couple or that we are brother and sister. No such thing with my mother.
A lot of occurences in my life has led me to think about this and I feel like she's reaching out to me right now. I've never really told her how I feel because I don't think she would take it very well. I don't want her to think that she has failed as a mother because ironically, I don't think she has failed at all. She did a good job of raising me, but in my eyes, my father contributed most to my development and raising me to the woman I am today. I am still trying to put all of this into perspective and hope that whatever I decide is the best thing to do.
Saturday, October 02, 2004
Back In Time
It is amazing how various things can make your mind travel back in time to a place, long ago and far away. Hearing a song, smelling a perfume, some home cooking, anything from the past that can evoke an emotion - love, regret, anger, rage, disappointment, sadness. Whatever the emotion, one just has to be strong, face whatever it is head on and deal with it.
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Unfaithful ...
The movie "Unfaithful" with Richard Gere and Diane Lane opened a lot of eyes to the truth and reality of infidelity in our modern day society. From the very beginning of time, it seems men and women just found it hard to keep their apples in one basket. In my conversations with a few members of the opposite sex, the explanations vary far and wide. Some of them are:
- The need for men to "divide and conquer" ... i.e., the need to feel that they can pursue and get any female
- God did not intend for man to have one partner ... (this one really got me!)
- Man can't eat chicken every day. There needs to be variety in life
- Not getting everything that is needed out of their current relationship
- Damn greedy ... can't be satisfied
- Material gain
- Nothing better to do than play the field
I am sure I could continue this list but will not bore you with the semantics of it all.
Perhaps because I have never been in the situation, I cannot speak with authority on the subject. Also, it is always different to be looking in than to be in the situation yourself. It is always said that love is blind and walk a day in my shoes, you will feel differently.
I believe in committment and honesty and maintain the view that the need to be unfaithful stems from a lack of satisfaction in one's relationship.
Is it so hard for people to remain faithful? It seems to be the order of the day now to have 2 and 3 men supporting a woman's lifestyle. Men now are in the habit of having "sugar-mommies" to take care of their every need. What is also interesting to note is that gone seem to be the days when men were the ones playing the field. Right now, it is hard to differentiate between men and women when it comes to the "Playa" mentallity.
Bwoy ... mi nuh know if it is how I was brought up or what but somethings just are unacceptable to me, unappealing to me. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't think for a second that I'm better than anyone for remaining faithful to my relationship but I do think that it is something to be proud of, no matter how stupid or naive it makes me look. A chic I know the other day said that no man now-a-days is being faithful, that women should just accept the fact that their man is being shared with some other woman and they should be grateful that he is not throwing/flaunting it in her face! I was appalled. Things like these bring back memories of the era in dancehall when every song centred around one title - "MATIE" .... Yeah, now ... it is getting more and more prevalent as the levels of infidelity in our society continue to increase.
For those of us who have remained faithful, more power to us! For those who haven't, there must be a good reason in your eyes for your actions, but that reason doesn't make it any more right no matter what the circumstance is. I love to see people around me feeling happy and enjoying life to the fullest. I just hate to see it being done with someone other than that person's significant other. I wish we could all get along, have wonderful happy relationships with the one we love.
There was a song (man, everyting mi talk 'bout, there's a song to go with it ... GOSH!!! I'm really a music junkie) that says, "If you can't be with the one you love, then love the one you're with".
Can we really do this? Do we have the courage or the will to do this? I wonder ....
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
Writer's Block
I have the urge to blog, but there's just nothing to blog about. I have decided not to write about all the negative things around me, the positives are things that I do not really want to share and then, there's writing about nothing which I don't really think I should do.
HELP!!!!
HELP!!!!
Thursday, September 23, 2004
Deep Thoughts - Just For Laughs
I can't believe how depressing my blog sounded this past week! Gosh!!! That is so out of character for me ... the always smiling, always laughing .... always on the brighter side of life! Well, here are some deep thoughts and a few laughs to change all that. Not sure who to give the props to but ... Thanks to whoever sat down and thought of all this shit!
1. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
2.One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
3.If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
4. Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?
5. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"
6. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
7. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
8. If the police arrest a mime, does he still have the right to remain silent?
9. Do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
10. Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
11. If a pit bull humps your leg you'd better fake an orgasm.
12. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
13. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
14. Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're a twat.
15. Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you'll be right.
16. The easiest way to find something that's lost is to buy a replacement.
17. How come when you open a can of evaporated milk it's still there?
18. Why is there only one Monopolies commission?
19. If a thing is worth doing, it would have been done already.
20. Guns don't kill people - Husbands who come home early kill people.
21. Why do you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
22. If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
23. Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed?
24. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic?
25. Why does mineral water that 'has trickled througH mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?
26. Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
Deep thoughts .... VeRy VeRy DeEp.
1. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
2.One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
3.If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
4. Should crematoriums give discounts for burn victims?
5. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"
6. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
7. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
8. If the police arrest a mime, does he still have the right to remain silent?
9. Do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
10. Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
11. If a pit bull humps your leg you'd better fake an orgasm.
12. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
13. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
14. Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're a twat.
15. Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you'll be right.
16. The easiest way to find something that's lost is to buy a replacement.
17. How come when you open a can of evaporated milk it's still there?
18. Why is there only one Monopolies commission?
19. If a thing is worth doing, it would have been done already.
20. Guns don't kill people - Husbands who come home early kill people.
21. Why do you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
22. If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
23. Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed?
24. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic?
25. Why does mineral water that 'has trickled througH mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?
26. Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
Deep thoughts .... VeRy VeRy DeEp.
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