Monday, November 29, 2004

I Love Advertisements!

How weird must a person be to actually prefer commercials to watching whatever TV Show is on? I love advertisements. My love for advertisements is something that started when I was a child. On numerous occasions my parents have told me of advertisements I loved as a child. One of them was an advertisement for a stout (forget the name right now) but the slogan was “Power in a McKeson Stout”. I would dance in front of the TV and sing along to the jingle … all when I was only 2 years old. That love for advertisements has grown with me to this day. I am one you will hear singing the commercials out loud or singing along with them when they air on radio or TV. As a career goal, I want to work in the field of Advertising.

Now, Christmas is always a time when companies go all out for their commercials. I must say at this point that I have always found local ads to be quite atrocious. Although they have a “Jamaican Flavour”, I personally don’t find them as creative as they can be or effective as they should be. In more recent times, there have been attempts to improve on the quality of local advertisements. However, I still think they leave much to be desired and that is a motivator for me to become the pioneer of local ads someday.
So I speak primarily of ads seen on Cable TV. One of my favourite ads so far this Christmas is the Old Navy commercials that mimic the Christmas carol “Jingle Bells”. I just find them to be so witty, to the point and really aim at reaching the appropriate audience, which is the purpose of an Advertisement. I’ve seen 2 so far, one for the Performance Fleece ($15.00 up) and Old Navy Sweaters …

Some of my favourite ads are: Capital One, Your Credit Card company (Identity theft), Orbit Sugar Free Gum, DiscoverCard, MasterCard, VISA, Elidel, Progressive. My list could go on and on and on.

When I grow up (smile) I want to be an Advertising Executive. Any influential people at prestigious Marketing/Advertising firms reading this blog and would like to hire me???

Sunday, November 28, 2004

Real Beauty Is On The Inside

Lady Serendipity did a post on UPN’s America’s Next Top Model, and it has prompted my post on the overall concept of beauty in the modern world.

In the 18th – 19th Century, beauty in women was measured by their Voluptuousness evidenced in artwork by several famous artists (think DaVinci, Picasso … not quite sure of their names – I was never good at Art). Women were painted with wide hips, large bottoms and breasts the size of grapefruits. These women were considered the most beautiful at that time. As culture has evolved, beauty is now measured by how thin a woman is. Note, that men are not measured with the same yardstick as women – the double standards we live with.

It seems that models – both beauty and fashion – have been getting thinner and thinner with each passing year. I’m surprised that we can still see them! The portrayal of beauty by magazines such as Vogue, Cosmopolitan, etc. has been the cause of trauma in many teenage girls who have turned to a life of Bulimia and Anorexia in at attempt to be “beautiful” by society’s standards. There have also been reports of suicide by girls considered “fat” by their peers.

As a plus sized woman (and a very sexy one if I may say so myself), I have observed friends battle the bulge in every way from dieting ridiculously to bulimia to becoming addicted to jogging. I was once accused of being Anorexic and I could not see how this could be possible given my weight. I have a weird stomach and a weird appetite. I can go days without eating simply because I just don’t feel hungry. And then there is a time when I’ll eat a good healthy meal! I have been on a drive to eat more healthy meals and try to exercise but it is primarily with a view to being healthy. Losing weight in the process will be a bonus for me. Ideally, I would like to lose 40-50lbs and while I may still be considered “fat” if I achieve that goal, I will be totally comfortable at that weight (don’t even think I’m gonna tell you what that is). However, I love myself so much and am happy with the way I am. It’s me and if I don’t appreciate me for who I am, then no one else will.

I learnt a long time ago that you should not judge a book by its cover. My post “You Can’t Tell By Looking” spoke of one aspect of this. It is not rare that you come across a person who is not beautiful by society’s standards but has the most beautiful personality you have ever come across. I’ve experienced this personally. The popular saying is that people who are physically challenged in whatever way try to make up for that deficiency by having a wonderful personality. Whether this is true or fiction is up for debate. However, how many times have we met someone of the same or opposite sex, who is physically beautiful by society’s standards - for a woman, it means having stats of 34-24-36 and for a man it is being tall, dark, handsome and muscular – and these people turn out to be the most annoying, disgusting, arrogant, obnoxious, bitchy person you have ever met in your life? I’m sure we can all say more than once. It is my belief in some cases that persons who are considered beautiful thinks it gives them the right to take advantage of others, belittle them and treat them in a condescending manner. If they think that makes them beautiful, in my eyes, that makes them more ugly than any person they think to be so.

What needs to happen is that persons who are not “living up” to the expectation of society by virtue of their appearance need to say to hell with the world! They need to have a high level of confidence, self esteem and love themselves for who they are. It is only when we love ourselves that others will love us. By being “comfortable in our skin” we will maintain a level of sanity and happiness to survive in this double standard world that we live in.

Saturday, November 27, 2004

Another Week …

I’ve made it through another week. And learnt that my trip has been extended by one more week! What are they doing to me?

While distraught at the thought of another week away from home, I am trying my best to remain strong for my darling who has inspired me to be all that I am. He thinks I’m the strongest woman he has ever met, not just because of this situation but many that I have experienced in our time together, and he is absolutely proud of me ... :-)

So, the countdown continues … 18 days gone ….20 more to go!!!

Friday, November 26, 2004

Meeting Etiquette

Another Friday, another weekend for me away from home ... boo hoo hoo ... I may be going clubbing with some ladies from the office tonight. Will let you know how that goes if I decide to go. Enjoy your weekend and for those of us in the corporate world, here is something to ponder on:


Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will be no longer been tolerated.

We do however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers. Therefore, a list of "TRY SAYING" new phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

1) TRY SAYING:
I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.
2) TRY SAYING:

She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a ball-busting bitch.

3) TRY SAYING:
Perhaps I can work late.

INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING:
I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f______ way.

5) TRY SAYING:
Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be shitting me!

6) TRY SAYING:
Perhaps! you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a shit.

7) TRY SAYING:
I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my f______ problem.

8) TRY SAYING:
That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING:
I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This shit won't work.

10) TRY SAYING:
I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING:
He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING:
Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat shit and die.

13) TRY SAYING:
So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING:
I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F___ it, I'm on salary.

15) TRY SAYING:
I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING:
I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This job sucks.

17) TRY SAYING:
You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the hell died and made you boss?

18 ) TRY SAYING:
He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a prick.

Thank You,
Human Resources

Monday, November 22, 2004

Bad Jamaicans

Would you believe that in my aim to reduce my telephone bills while away from home, I finally made it to the Cable & Wireless office here to purchase a phone card. Upon asking for a phone card to call Jamaica, the agent told me that the cards do not work to Jamaica. She further said that it was discontinued because "the Jamaicans found a way to override the system and make calls to Jamaica for free using the card so they made it bad for everyone who wanted to call Jamaica".

Damn to them all who caused this!!!!

A Virtuous Woman

Following on my previous post, the vintage Housekeeping Monthly article raised some questions in my mind. How are women/wives viewed in relationships in the 21st century?

It seems long gone are the days that women were thought of as property, designed solely for the purpose of housekeeping, child bearing, child rearing, providing sexual gratification and all other needs to her husband. With women’s liberation a reality, what is a real woman and what is her purpose?

I will attempt to answer question 1 in a nutshell. A real woman: A female specie of virtue (def.: high caliber, good worth, good value, desirable quality), who knows who she is and doesn’t compromise it, independent without being over-bearing, genuine in character, strong, a provider, a friend. Some readers may not agree with this statement in its entirety or minutely. However, when you put it into perspective, think outside the box, look at the bigger picture, then you will agree that there is a whole lot of truth to my statement. A woman’s purpose is many and varied now a days. No longer are we simply expected to bear children, rear children, cook, clean, wash, iron and provide sexual gratification. Women are now home makers, corporate executives and contributors to society all at the same time.

What irks me now-a-days are these “women” who feel it necessary to cheapen their existence by stooping to levels lower than the deepest seas. The old phrase “A women can’t do what a man does and still be a lady” no longer seems to phase the female population as they are doing all that men were previously accused of and more. It is almost commonplace for women to have more than one male companion satisfying every need – one for money, one to take them out on the town, one to pay bills, one to maintain their physical image, a tiger in bed, and the list can go on and on depending on what the female sets as her goal. It seems as if every other women now a days is engaged in more than one relationship.

An acquaintance of mine said the other day that she wanted to talk to me to get some advice (yeah, I’m a counselor). I haven’t gotten a chance to talk to her yet but found out from a mutual friend that she’s cheating on her current boyfriend, with a married man. She loves BF #1, but BF #2 has everything she has been looking for in a man. She doesn’t want to break it off with BF #1 because he might get violent and she’s waiting for them to have an argument so that they can break up.

Another acquaintance of mine said and I try to quote:

“A my house mi a defen’ inna 2005. Whateva mi haffi do fi get it, a dat a go gwaan. Mi want a money man. Him nuh even haffi bi mine. Jus as long as di money a run, mi alright”.

Now, this is only 2 people that I know and without a doubt there are many others like that out there.

Every man needs a woman, a good woman to stand beside them. No man or woman is complete until he has found that one person who fulfils his every need. Should that dream be thrown away? Is their virtue worth the material gain they will experience? What of the Virtuous Woman that Warrior King sings about? How many of them are there left in the world?

I know of at least one ... :-)

More time.

Sunday, November 21, 2004

The Good Wife’s Guide

The below article was taken from Housekeeping Monthly, May 13, 1955 …. (don’t ask). Let me know what you think. One thing came to mind as I read this …. Fred & Wilma Flinstone!

Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the welcome needed.

Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch of your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work weary people.

Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.

Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper, etc. and then run a dust cloth over the tables

Over the cooler months of the year, you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces, comb their hair and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to se them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

Be happy to see him

Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first – remember his topics of conversation are more important than yours

Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand dhis world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.

Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

Don’t greet him with complaints and problems.

Don’t complain if he’s late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.

Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.

A good wife always knows her place.

Saturday, November 20, 2004

When I get Rich ….

I have always thought about what ridiculous toy I would get if I were to become filthy stinkin’ rich. With my visit to BVI, the “Sailing Capital of the World” as it is called, I am now leaning towards a Yacht.

Background. The British Virgin Islands is a group of approximately 50 islands. The most popular of these are Tortola (where I am), Virgin Gorda and Anegada. As you can appreciate, Tortola is quite small, the expanse of the island can be covered in 1 hr’s drive. So, putting things in perspective, it is more realistic to have a boat here than a car. They have ferrys similar to our own Port Royal ferry in Jamaica to take you from island to island as required.

Yesterday morning, I met a gentleman, Bill, who had just completed the Caribbean 500 sail from Virgina. He placed 2nd and was quite happy about that. He explained that the Caribbean 500 is an annual sail that takes place this time of year. It has 2 categories, Rally Sailing and Cruise Sailing. All this is mumbo jumbo but, the hotel I am staying at also has a Marina with a dock that holds close to 100 yachts that I have seen since I’ve been here. Yachts of various sizes, shapes, colours and types have come in to the dock each day. I was particularly impressed with one called the “Contraria”. It is the largest yacht I’ve seen to date. Firstly, I thought, what could lead to the choice of such a name. The boat is blue and white, the “Contraria” written in gold, white and blue sails and a union jack flying from it. The boat looked similar to that in Jay Z’s “Big Pimpin” music video. I can just picture these people on the sail having a party on board, making mad love on the high seas and just enjoying a lifestyle of the rich and famous.

Apart from the thrill of a race, I am a particular lover of water (although I have a fear of drowning) and without a doubt would enjoy the adventure of sailing from port to port, breathing in the sea breeze, having the water splash in my face from time to time, enjoying the view of passing various islands and reefs … and ….. Making Passionate love to the sounds of the waves beating against my boat’s bow.

So … my decision is made. When I become a Multi-Billionaire/Millionaire, I won’t be wasting my money on clothes and Jewellery …. Well, maybe some Jewellery. But I will definitely be investing in my very own Yacht. I think I’ll call her …. Cool Destiny!

Friday, November 19, 2004

TGIF ... I think ...

Well, It's Friday and I'm winding down at the office. I have nothing planned for tonight or tomorrow but should be going to church on Sunday. Hopefully I can change the no plans for tonight ... will let you know on Monday.

Here's wishing everyone a wonderful weekend!

PS. "A Virtuous Woman" ... Coming Soon To A Blog Near You!!!

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Reality Check!

Today I mustered up the courage to check at the front desk for a tally of my phone calls to home since I have been here. The consensus now is that I will not be making any more calls from the hotel. After being here a total of 6 days, the cost of telephone calls I have made equates to approximately 1 year of phone calls back home! How ridiculous is that?

It has given me a reality check that I do not welcome, do not want, hesitate to act on, apprehensive to accept … but have no choice but to.

The purpose of taking this assignment apart from the exposure, adding another island to my list of travels and to impart knowledge (not in that order of course) was the opportunity it presented to save some extra money. For those who travel on behalf of your company will understand that there are some financial benefits to be gained from this. As it stands now, I will have almost erased any possibility of doing that.

So, my significant other has put me on a regimen …. Adding to my TORTURE!!! Restricting the amount of times I call and how long I stay on the phone with him. How does he expect me to survive? I feel like I’m literally dying here. Yeah, yeah, I’m sure you’re all saying, “Shi weak eh!”. Sorry to disappoint all those of you who know me and probably think of me as the strongest person you know. I have a weakness too and my weakness is the one I love. He knows that this regimen is best for us both in terms of what we want to achieve. I also know that it is the best thing to do but it doesn’t make it any easier to accept or deal with. Today was the first of this regimen …. Can you all spell it with me … T-O-R-T-U-R-E!!! Don’t think I’m exaggerating or blowing this way out of proportion. I am merely expressing the emotional state this has put me in. It is not easy for either of us but I think it is harder for me being away from home. This is not the 1st time I have traveled and it won’t be the last. I’m scheduled to be away again in January 2005, albeit just for 4 days but at least there is prepaid roaming with Digicel now so I can get a pre-paid SIM and it will be all good in Miami (my post paid would be too expensive).

The only thing keeping my sanity is the normal hectic job, your blogs and emails from friends. Kudos to you all!

Also, the chick I am training asked me to fly to Puerto Rico next weekend to shop since everything there will be on sale for Thanksgiving …. I’m wondering if I should? What say you all?

Monday, November 15, 2004

Liar Liar Pants on Fire ... Helping My Torture

Today was equally depressing but more bearable being at work and all. It is amazing how easily I fit into any environment in which I work. I’ve hit the ground running in BVI, interacting with customers. People have even commented on how professional I am and how at ease I look with the customers I have dealt with. It was very busy today but welcomed as it takes my mind off the inevitable situation in which I find myself. Think I may just get drunk tonight … hhhmmmm, interesting thought.

Anyhoo, I am now in the “comfort” of my hotel room, watching one of my favourite Jim Carrey movies, Liar Liar. This movie is one of his most hilarious in my opinion and it got me thinking what it would be like for the world if we couldn’t lie. I mean, lying has become so commonplace in our society that it is as accepted as pre-marital sex now a days (yes, the last time I checked, having sex before marriage, aka fornication was still a sin).

We seem to lie about the simplest things. IMHO (Thanks Scratchie), I think that it is impossible to go through this life without lying. However, it should be the exception rather than the norm. For example, if one needs to lie to save a life or to spare the feelings of another, then I completely support lies under these conditions. Such as, in Liar Liar, Jim Carrey’s character Fletcher Reid explained to his son that when his mother was pregnant and had gained 40 lbs, she asked him how she looked and he told her that she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. In truth, he thought she looked like a cow but spared her feelings by telling her a lie about how beautiful she looked at that time. This I think is acceptable and any similar situation. Lying to save your life, say if you are being held up by a man at gun point, whatever it takes to save your life, I say do it. What I don’t appreciate or support is the casual liar who tells “white lies” as we call it. Lies for no good reason are despicable and should be avoided at all costs. Like lying to cover up a wrong we did or to get someone else in trouble or to make ourselves look good to others … Contemptible. It is said that once you start to lie, you can’t stop because you lie then tell another lie to cover up the 1st lie and before you know it, you are so caught up in the lie that it either catches up on you or you actually start to believe it to be the truth and a reality.

Now, I lie too just like the average person. However, I try to live my life in such a way that I do not need to do it more than is absolutely necessary.

I deserve a pat on the back … don’t I??

Saturday, November 13, 2004

DAY 3 OF TORTURE

After I stopped feeling sorry for myself (sort of) and decided that I might as well try to overcome this depression that I feel coming over me like a fog in the night, I took a shower, got dressed and decided to go on an exploration of this island of Tortola. For those who may not know, BVI is a group of over 50 islands, the main of these being Tortola and Virgin Gorda. A friend of mine said to me when I was leaving that when I return to Jamaica, I should either be British or a Virgin …. I know which one I won’t be …

Anyway, I put my clothes on and stepped out into the unknown. I walked to the end of the road, looked left, looked right and decided to go left. I found myself on the Marina which is a part of the crap of a hotel I’m staying (more on this later) and I walked on the dock, admiring the yachts and saying that I will own one of these things before I die. Then, I saw a semblance of a mall to the left of the Marina so I ventured in that direction. Nothing … Insurance Companies and 1 souvenir/gift shop! What kind of a mall is that???? The souvenir shop … just like every other in the Caribbean (almost), nothing worth even looking at. As I stepped out of this establishment, I now ventured right and then ……………………


It starts to rain! Fuck!! I finally decide that I might as well find something better to do than stay in the hotel room, sleep, watch TV, eat, shit, whatever … and the fucking rain!!
I’m so pissed. It rained, and rained, and rained, I had to walk back to the hotel in the rain! And then ….

Sneezing, sneezing, sneezing. I hope to God I don’t get sick. That I can’t deal with for sure.

What next????

Friday, November 12, 2004

Extreme Torture

I arrived in the British Virgin Islands last night after a 4 hour delay in Antigua. Talk about tired ... that was me. In addition to this, I was not able to communicate with my significant other for this time. I hate being away from home and away from him so that is the source of my extreme sadness and torture!

I will be away for 4 weeks on behalf of my company. I travel quite often on behalf of my company usually anywhere between 3 days and 2 weeks. This is the first time I'm asked to be away for 4 weeks minimum ... and from the looks of things ... I'd better start singing Christmas Carols!

I'm totally devastated. The thought of being away from the comforts of home and the security of my baby's arms, is not one that is welcomed at all. The travel has its benefits in that it pays more for me to be here and I get a chance to be seen and heard within my company. I've done that already, hence my selection out of a region of 15 countries to go to various islands to work in one capacity or another. This trip is to provide relief and training to a new recruit into my line of work.

Nonetheless, I'm saddened by the distance. It is said it makes the heart grow fonder and the other wander .... I'm hoping that in my case it is the former. In addition, it costs US$2.00 to call home and I'm pretty sure I must have done all my money on phone calls already which is quite tragic. It's difficult and quite challenging to make the transition from being able to pick up the phone and call your partner at anytime of the day for anything, big or small, just to say Hi or I love you or to make sure they are ok. It is hard for me, very, very hard.

I'll continue to make desperate attempts to not get depressed. BVI is not a happening island, there's not much to do here and the cable at my hotel sucks big time. I however have 2 novels I took with me so at least I have that and my laptop!

Keep me company guys. I have to make an empassioned plea for you all (except Steverino) to post regularly to your blogs so that I may not die of boredom ... PLEASE ... I BEG OF YOU!!!


Thursday, November 11, 2004

Monday, November 08, 2004

"Know From Afar" - What an Honour!!

Who knew that when I started this blog in June, that I would still be at it in November? Not even I knew and it demonstrates my theme, "Patience Is A Virtue". Also, when I started, didn't think that more than 2 people would actually view my rantings, ramblings and ravings about the world, my life, etc.

Now, I'm on the "Know From Afar" listing on Peter M.'s blog and I feel honoured. Am I being silly? It's just a blog for crying out loud! Well, it's a big deal to me since I viewed this blog initially as just a new phase that would eventually pass when I got bored. That day hasn't come yet, and until it does, I'll be around.

So, this blog goes out to Peter. Thanks for reading and for finding my comments and my blog worthy of being added to your "Know From Afar" list!!

Kudos.

Sunday, November 07, 2004

Passion Unleashed

Wanting, Needing
Feeling, Groping
Breathing, Moaning
Passion unleashed

Touching, kissing
Beating hearts
Licking lips
Holding Hands
Smiling, Winking
Passion Unleashed

A simple touch
A light caress
Electrifying
Whether with hands,
Fingers or tongue
Imminent arousal
Passion building

No time to wait
Release in inevitable
Can't Hardly Wait
For us to both feel
The depth of my love
And my Passion unleashed.

-NLJ-


Saturday, November 06, 2004

102 Things About Me

I had to give in to this one. So many blogs I’ve checked out in recent times has this list: “100 Things About Me”… first seen on Peter M.’s blog.

In an attempt to be different, below is my list: “102 Things About Me”

1. I’m an only child
2. I’m not a typical only child
3. My father told me that he wanted 7 children … before he had me!
4. I was the youngest person in my graduating class in High School
5. I was born in St. Andrew, Jamaica at 5:15 a.m. on May 14
6. My first sexual encounter occurred when I was 6 years old
7. This encounter was with an 8 year old boy
8. He didn’t know what sex was.
9. I think I have a split personality
10. I once got drunk on purpose
11. My best friend had to persuade me not to take my top off in the club
12. I was very very happy that night.
13. The first Cassette I ever bought was Tiffany’s debut album.
14. I have a passion for Music
15. I’m a sitcom junkie
16. My favourite comedy of all time is Seinfeld
17. People think my father and I are brother and sister because of the way we interact
18. If I had my choice of X-Men characters, I would be Mystique
19. Think I would call my daughter Mystique … (scary)
20. I want to have 6 children
21. I have none yet
22. I think Masters Degrees are over-rated
23. My favourite singer is Madonna
24. Both my parents are teachers
25. I work in Banking
26. I once had a pet cat named Princess
27. She got run down on the street where I live
28. A cat once crawled through my window and pounced on my back
29. I thought it was my father playing with me
30. I freaked out when I put my hand behind me and felt fur
31. I find the sea relaxing
32. I have a fear of drowning
33. I have an unnatural fear of cockroaches
34. I have a very high sex drive
35. If it were possible, I would have sex every day
36. Hhhhhhmmm, I think I need to make it possible!
37. I have an obsession with Thong panties
38. Someone once bought me “Anne Hooper’s Ultimate Sex Guide: A Sex Therapist’s Personalized Program For Enriching Your Sex Life”
39. A pack of Erotica condoms accompanied this gift
40. I would like to go on a European Cruise before I die
41. People constantly tell me I have a beautiful smile
42. I’m obsessed with brushing my teeth
43. My favourite toothpaste is Listerine Gel
44. I once wanted to be a Stand Up comedian
45. I once wanted to be a stripper
46. See #25
47. I hate teddy bears
48. My favourite alcoholic drink is Rum Cream
49. I’ve always wanted a baby sister
50. I’m in Love
51. I absolutely love astronomy
52. I don’t believe in aliens
53. I think Psychics are fake
54. I almost won the lottery once
55. Like to dance
56. I’m a wonderful person to have as a friend
57. I don’t like hypocrites
58. I think people take advantage of me sometimes
59. I think I’m capable of committing murder
60. And not get caught
61. I’ve never been called for Jury Duty
62. Hope that when I do it’s for a rape case
63. I believe in Capital punishment … (ooops, hope I didn’t make enemies here)
64. My cell phone currently rings “We Wish You a Merry X-Mas"
65. It's been on that since October 1
66. Christmas is my least favourite holiday of the year
67. I have a Nokia cell phone
68. Nokia is my name rearranged
69. I love word games
70. My boyfriend constantly wins at Scrabble
71. He doesn’t know that I let him win
72. I’m smart
73. People think I’m very mature and wise for my age
74. People have thought this since I was 10
75. My dentist told me when I was 9 that I have the teeth of a 12 year old
76. I have kept a journal since 1989
77. I used to write poetry
78. I write less poetry now
79. I have hopes of being a Rock/Pop star someday
80. I came 2nd in a Singing Contest
81. I am someone you can count on, loyal, dependable and honest
82. I’ve shoplifted
83. And got caught
84. “I’m not a crook”
85. My favourite fragrance is Narcisse Chloe.
86. This fragrance aggravates the sinuses of 3 of my coworkers
87. I don’t wear Narcisse Chloe to work anymore
88. I enjoy being in Love. It’s Wonderful
89. I might elope instead of having a wedding
90. If I do have a wedding, I will only have 50 people in attendance (being very optimistic here)
91. Pleasure on all levels turns me on ... whoa!!
92. Sometimes I think I’m a masochist
93. I have calendars on my wall as far back as 1998
94. I make markings on my calendars for special days
95. I have dandruff
96. My favourite colour is purple, blue is a close 2nd
97. I once tried to practice telekinesis
98. Think that’s when I developed a Migraine
99. My mother used to think I faked headaches to escape chores
100. She sucks
101. I type 120 words per minute
102. To know me is to love me … honestly… I’m great!

Changes

"The Only Thing Constant is Change"

I'm not quite sure who said that, but this person was right on the money.

In life, when we find ourselves getting comfortable with a situation, whether it is with our job, with our family, in our relationship, life throws us a curveball that blows us right out of the water. I've had many of these this year and am now actually looking forward to the beginning of another challenging, rewarding, mind-boggling, tear-jerking year.

I should be talking about Christmas right .... well, that I'll do in another blog

More time, zeen.

Little Alice (Adapted)

Gotta give kudos to the author of this joke ... whoever he/she is!

Little Alice was in her 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman, doctor, lawyer.
Alice was being uncharacteristically quiet, so the teacher asked her about her father.

"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer's really good, he'll go home with some guy And make love with him for money."

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the Other children to work on some exercises and took little Alice aside to Ask her,

"Is that really true about your father?"

"No," said Alice.

"He works for the Bush administration, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."

LMAO!

Monday, November 01, 2004

Work Day From Hell .... Grrrr

I'm having one of those days from hell at work. It's like everything is just going wrong, everyone is getting on my last nerve!!! Grrrrr .... I need a break!